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naty.jpg

so, my sister got married last weekend.

that is to say, she’s been married for a year.  it happened in Vegas, as a matter of fact.  So she got married again, but she did it properly.  With authority.  She went all out.

a few differences from last year’s wedding to her wedding 2.o.  I wasnt there.  I regret it.  I heard it was great fun.  Theoretically it would have been more along my line of preference, too;  it was small and in a place where fun finds you.  But alas I wasnt there.  This year I was there, and there must have been something like 300 people, maybe more?  can’t say.  And I could have never imagined how much fun this wedding was going to be.

It was nutso.  Pretty much from the beginning people started drinking.  As soon as the ceremony was over, me and a couple of others snuck back to the limo to drink some warm brews.  No shame whatsoever.  In the limo, my brother Ivan got drenched with champagne (by mistake, granted)  Everyone kept putting ice in their warm beer like we were still in high school.

At the reception hall (very professionally run, by the way) everything was ready for us.  Any and every drink was available.  The food was excellent.  the hosts were very helpful and always looking out for you.  The only thing we had to worry about was the heat outside while taking pictures, but that was nothing a little Henessy or Johnny Black couldnt take care of.

anyway enough of the rant.  it was crazy, a lotta fun, people got drunk, i took some embarrassing pictures.  congrats to Naty and Nick.

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for those of you who have experienced the awesomeness that is Superbad, you already know the movie was a few notches above excellent.  Only the experience of seeing the 40 year old virgin in theater comes close, not coincidently another Judd Apatow project.  Michael Cera’s delivery was on-point, and you felt a connection with all the characters’ worries (albeit petty concerns on a superficial level)

The easiest label to annoint a movie like this is “gross out comedy.”  We’ve see this before with the American Pie series and Scary Movie series.  The simple premise for movies like these is to hire a cast of young good looking thespians and put them in comedic sexual situations that hopefully will get cannonized in our short term memories, a not-so-hard- feat seeing as all we really do is think about sex.  All of these roundabout scenes should connote a coming of age story to put a more nostalgic notion to an otherwise disposable product.  Few have worked in this sense, like the first American Pie movie, and now Superbad.

How those involved in the moviemaking process develop the idea of “gross” is purely on them.  In AP, they went as far as making a protagonist drink some man-milk right before he was gonna get laid.  Pretty funny stuff.  Scary Movie used tactics like tucking in your junk.  In Superbad, most what could be considered gross-out is done through dialogue.

This is where I can’t justfiably consider this movie a gross out comedy, but instead a collection of vignettes and anecdotes set to an above-average Friday night.  To say the movie has a plot is comical at best; three boys try to score some alcohol in order to show up to a party and maybe experience some sort of sexual satisfaction.  That’s it if you want to look at it that way.  A more satisfying (if not complex) way to look at it would be a group of friends and associates discussing embarassing moments from their adolescent phase, probably making some up and augmenting others, and putting it together in a concise package for mass distribution.  That the package was deemed worthy enough for consumption  proves many execs saw a lot of promise in any and all marketing plans for the movie.

Their seemed to be a lot of artistic honesty in the dialogue.  Often I found myself relating to what was being discussed, like hiding an erection with the elastic part of your undies.  Or debating your respective preferences in porn you like.  I remember a lot of my friends made fun of one friend of ours because he liked man vs woman porn rather than a lesbian sex romp.  By our thinly defined standards, we viewed his preference in watching “normal” hetero porn as him wanting to see dick.  In superbad, one of the characters needs to see it because it just doesnt seem right for dick to be missing in the porn equation.  I’m sure this topic has been debated in many forms,  but i’ve never included/intruded myself in another clique’s discussion of the subject.  So (to me at least) there’s a voyeiristic thrill to this movie.

There’s way more to discuss about this movie from a pure entertainment viewpoint (MacLovin, I’m sorry I blocked your cock).  But i just rather not.  it’s much more fun to quote the movie or discuss sexual experiences with someone in front of you.  Our country’s population is a pretty prude, reserved bunch.  That’s whay we laugh like little bitches watching a movie like this one.  Hopefully this kind of open dialogue can help us all just a little bit.

i’m a part time bartender, meaning i normally sacrifice my weekend nights to provide thirsty alcoholix with their fix.  all in all its a pretty good job.  i get to interact with a lot of different people and the time flies rather quickly on an average night.  most importantly, you come out with money in your pocket.  and when it seems like you might be really broke it is definitely the best job around.

the worst part BY FAR about the bartending are managers and/or owners.  I’ve never worked in a place that encourages buybacks (ie. “this round’s on me”), and its just been in my nature as a bartender and a patron that after you’ve spent a decent amount of $$$ and you established yourself as a good tipper, you should get hooked every once in a while.  I’ve dismissed threats that the owner is watching my actions from the security camera, until it was proven true to me when i hooked a certain lovely female with a cocktail and no sooner than 5 minutes later do I have my manager tell me that the owner caught me doing it.  I didnt feel bad about it; in fact i didnt care.  They didnt schedule me for a couple of weeks and i pretty much got the message that i was fired until i got a pathetic voicemail from my manager telling me the new bartender didnt work out and if i could come by and work that saturday night.  I didnt feel like calling back, but i worked there a couple of weeks later (last weekend, in fact).  Apparently the new bartender got a couple of complaints about the drinks she was making and took it to heart.  She went on her cigarette break and never came back.  Me thinks her problems extend way past her drink-making abilities.

I started at a new place, which might be a bad experiment for me.  It’s a restaurant/lounge that just opened its doors.  I worked a rather slow friday night, but it wasnt totally empty.  i walked out with only $50, by far the worst night of my short bartendindg career as far as tips are concerned.  I’m willing to give this place some moire time only because its right by a college campus and school opens ina couple of weeks.  Plus the people I work with are generally cool.

Yeah, the majority of the peploe i have worked with as a bartender are a lovely bunch.  They tend to be on the attractive side, and all they ever want to do is bullshit.  those are pretty good friends to have. 

I dont consider myself to be a totally attractive person,but my job has made it so much easier to make female contacts.  And I’m not counting girls who are just trying to fenagle some free drinks out of me.  I’m normally happy to oblige to a hot chick that thinks she has me by the short hairs, but i can tell she would not want anything to do with me in real life.  I’m talking about girls who are genuinely interested.  Girls have given me their number; totally random.  I had someone, i forget who it is, tell me that as a bartender i’m the “center of attention”, in a manner of speaking.  I kind of agree.  It really couldn;’t get any easier.

Another trend in my job is that it can be so easy to sleep with a coworker.  It’s so hard to avoid that trap, considering that as previously mentioned they are attractive.  The trick becomes weeding out the ones with big mouths and only staying friendly with those who are totally cool with discretion. 

If i have any decent bartending-related stories, i’ll post them in the future.

i used to have a job where we had to endure the local lite station 106.7 lite FM in NY, where they play some Barry White songs, a couple of Rod Stewart joints, and a hodgepodge of crappy singers like Celine Dion, Whitney Houston (SHE’S NOT SO BAD REALLY, AFTER A WHILE YOU JUST FAIL TO SEE WHATS SO SPECIAL ABOUT HER), and The Eagles.

I did acquire a liking for Michael Buble, but i have to face my own demons when it’s all said and done with that mini-obsession.

I work in a new place and all we listen to here is 103.5 KTU, which for the unaware is a mixture of what might as well be dance-lite music.  They shuffle among 80s freestyle (TKA, george lamond), plenty of madonna, destiny’s child (i dont mind this at all), almost every song from Timberlake’s Futuresex/lovesounds album, and some classics.

They play Xtina Aguilera’s “genie in a bottle” like its brand new.

They play Toni Braxton’s “Not man enough for me” (or whatever the song is called) once a day.  It’s true.  I’ve kept count.

I once interned at a record label.  Aside from hearing new songs from label talent before anyone else, you usually heard a leaked album from some rappers upcoming effort.  And they wondered why sales were down.

I volunteered for the CMJ Music Marathon last year.  I figured I would hear some pretty cool music in the production room, but i mostly heard the crappy new Public Enemy album, and the most recent Beck (the ones I quit caring about).

Office or work music sucks.

 

some thoughts on Com’s new album finding forever:

He has definitely ran out of things to say.  His last interesting thoughts were laid out all throughout his highly-hated Electric Circus, but now it seems he doesnt want to take his writing to different levels.  I hope he’s not confusing production with writing;  I for one do enjoy parts of EC, although I cringe at times.  His last 2 albums have been handled by Kanye West, who has done a superb job, particularly this time around.  He even outshines Common on “Southside,” another ode to the Windy City. 

His redundancy is comical at best.  He likes to find new derivatives for comments like “I love my sisters” or “I stopped eating meat/i’m a vegan,” or “get ready for the revolution,” or “my daughter yada yada,” or [insert spoken word rambling here]. 

His voice remains compelling, however.  It seems that he has grown comfortably in being an old-man rapper, even showing more commercial success as time passes (he got his first number 1 debut a couple of weeks back – deservidly so).  He can still carry a full length, partly because he’s keeping it as brief as possible.

Good move by including Lily Allen on the album.  The song is hot , and has potential for more crossover laurels.

“Black Maybe” is an awesome song.

Dont know how many of these he has left in him.  He should consider taking another blod move, seeing as how now he has a movie career to fall back on, hopefully for him.

I’ll refrain from speaking on the album art.  NOT!!!  that cover is awful, mainly because Common looks like a boho Jedi.